How to become confident is a frequently asked question. Let me answer it with seven simple yet super effective steps you could take to gain back your self confidence!
Why do I say “gain back”? Because confidence is something you were born with.
Sadly, it was taken from you when people drilled you with negative affirmations about who you are and shattered your clarity about life early on! The more you became doubtful, the more you lost confidence.
Now, maybe it’s when you have to give a presentation, meet someone new, or take on a new challenge. But what if you could train yourself to be confident no matter what life throws at you?
Good news: self confidence is something you can claim back!
Building confidence and self esteem is like building a muscle: the more you work on it, the stronger it gets!
In this blog, I’ll walk you through 7 actionable ways to gaining self confidence, so you can face the world with your head high and shoulders back.
1. Use the Power of Visualization
Ever heard of the phrase “See it to believe it”? Well, visualization is a technique athletes and performers swear by to gain self confidence.
The idea is simple: visualize yourself succeeding at something before you do it.
Picture every little detail—how you’ll act, what you’ll say, how it feels when you succeed. This creates a mental blueprint, making it easier for your brain to follow through in real life.
Example: If you have a big job interview coming up, visualize yourself walking in confidently, answering questions smoothly, and shaking hands at the end with a smile.
The more you practice this mental exercise, the more natural it will feel when it’s time to perform for real.
P.S. This is also the ideal therapy for low self esteem!
2. Set Clear Goals in Life
Building confidence in yourself requires having a mind that’s sharp and focused!
Confidence grows when you have a sense of direction and purpose. Setting goals, both big and small, helps you feel more in control.
Break down your big dreams into smaller, achievable milestones, and celebrate every time you hit one. Achieving even small wins builds momentum and reinforces your belief in yourself.
Example: If your goal is to get in shape, don’t aim to run a marathon right away. Start by setting a goal to jog for 10 minutes every day.
Every time you meet a mini-goal, you’ll feel a burst of confidence that motivates you to keep going.
3. Tap into NLP Reframing
A self esteem coach will usually use this technique on you.
But you don’t need to drain your hard-earned money for something that you could effortlessly do on your own!
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a technique that helps you reframe negative thoughts into positive ones. It can be practiced as a confidence therapy.
The way we talk to ourselves matters.
If you tell yourself, “I always mess things up,” your brain will believe it. But NLP teaches you to challenge that belief and reframe it into something empowering, like: “Even if I mess up, I learn and get better every time.”
Example: Let’s say you feel nervous about giving a speech because you think, “What if I mess up?”
Using NLP reframing, you can turn that thought into, “What if I impress everyone and they love what I have to say?” This simple shift can change everything.
4. Learn to Use CBT
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most powerful ways to improve self esteem!
This magic tool can be used for changing unhelpful thought patterns. (I tried it once and the results were astounding!)
It’s based on the idea that our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are all connected. When you catch yourself thinking negatively, you can replace those thoughts with healthier ones.
Example: Imagine you think, “I’ll never be good at public speaking.”
A CBT approach would encourage you to identify this as a cognitive distortion. You could replace it with, “I might not be perfect yet, but I can improve with practice.”
It’s all about catching those sneaky negative thoughts and starving them out! Well, that’s how to develop self confidence. By depriving bad thoughts of energy!
5. Do Positive Self Talk
It’s time to be your own cheerleader and not look for self esteem help outside!
Positive self-talk is about reminding yourself of your strengths, even when things get tough. Replace that inner critic with an encouraging coach.
It may feel silly at first, but the more you practice it, the more natural it becomes.
Example: Instead of thinking, “I’m terrible at this,” try saying, “I’m learning, and every step is progress.” Over time, this habit rewires your brain to focus on growth instead of failure.
P.S. You could also try hypnosis for confidence and blend it with positive self talk for life-changing results.
6. Practice Yoga
How to develop confidence the easy way? Do yoga! You might not think of yoga as a confidence booster, but it works wonders.
Confidence isn’t just in your mind—it’s also in your body.
When you practice yoga, you improve your posture, body awareness, and mental clarity, which all contribute to feeling more grounded and self-assured.
Certain poses like the “warrior pose” are considered among the best confidence building exercises. They naturally make you feel strong and empowered.
Pro Tip: Try starting your day with a short yoga session.
Just 10 minutes of mindful movement can reset your mood and make you feel ready to tackle anything that comes your way.
7. Self-Question to Clear Doubts
When self-doubt creeps in, it’s important to question your assumptions. Are your fears really based on facts, or are they just thoughts trying to hold you back?
Learning to self-question is a great way to boost self esteem! It gives you clarity and helps you separate fear from reality.
Example: If you’re afraid to apply for a new job because you think you’re not qualified enough, ask yourself: “Is that true? What evidence do I have that I won’t succeed?”
You’ll often realize that your doubts are just fears, not facts.
So, keep questioning your illogical, fictional mental drama. It’s the perfect way to improve self confidence in the long term!
Conclusion
The above confidence building activities have been proven to work like a charm for those who apply them with persistence and consistency.
Building confidence doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a journey. Realizing this is key to overcoming low self esteem!
But, of course, the good news is that confidence is a skill EVERYBODY can develop.
Whether you’re visualizing success, practicing yoga, reframing negative thoughts with NLP, or setting clear goals, each step you take helps you grow stronger and more self-assured.
Remember, confidence isn’t about never feeling fear or doubt—it’s about facing them head-on and knowing you’ll come out stronger on the other side.
So start today, take small steps, and watch how these strategies transform the way you see yourself and the world around you.
You’ve got this!